Growing up in the ghetto made me –Ruth Kadiri

For actress, script writer and movie maker, Ruth Kadiri, it’s a story of grass to grace. Kadiri, who grew up in Africa’s largest ghetto, Ajegunle, but who ended up becoming a screen goddess recently shared her story with The Entertainer.

Excerpts:
SOME PEOPLE SAY YOU ARE A BETTER WRITER THAN AN ACTRESS, WHAT IS YOUR TAKE?
In my opinion, it is not right for me to judge my works. I ap­preciate every talent that I have; both acting and writing. They are uniquely different. I don’t see my­self comparing them in any way. It is my duty to do my job and it is their duty to analyze it.
WHEN YOU STARTED OUT, DID YOU EVER SEE YOUR­SELF COMING THIS FAR?
Yes.
HAS THERE BEEN A COM­MENT THAT HIT YOU REAL HARD YOU BROKE DOWN IN TEARS?
No, not yet. I have never had that experience and I pray that it doesn’t get to that level.
HAVE YOU EVER HAD TO KISS AN ACTOR WITH BAD BREATH ON SET?
I hardly kiss in movies.
WHICH ACTOR WOULD YOU SAY HAS GIVEN YOU YOUR BEST KISS EVER?
(Laughter) Are you kidding me? I don’t know. There is no personal attachment when you kiss in a movie; I still don’t know why people don’t understand that there is no attachment when it comes to kissing in a film.
YOU RECENTLY FLAUNTED YOUR RANGE ROVER SPORT. WHAT SPURRED THAT MOVE?
No! I did not; I am not that kind of a person. If you go to my Instagram page, you will not find it there. I don’t even know where or how they got that picture. It was just a presumption from a blogger that turned out to be true; I don’t post pictures of my car online.
SO, PRESUMPTION WAS RIGHT JUST AS THEY PRESUMED THAT THE GUY WITH YOU WAS YOUR BOY­FRIEND…
No, he is not my boyfriend! Are you kidding me? Oh my God! I don’t even have the strength. He is just a friend; somebody I have known for like forever.
ARE YOU CURRENTLY IN A RELATIONSHIP?
Yes
DO YOU HAVE ANY MAR­RIAGE PLANS?
Hopefully, we will get there by the grace of God.
I AM SURE YOUR FANS WOULD WANT TO KNOW…
I am a woman. I don’t know when the proposal….
BUT WHO IS YOUR IDEAL MAN?
Every woman wants a good man; every woman wants a God-fearing man.
BUT WHAT’S YOUR WISH LIST, THERE MUST BE SOMETHING YOU REALLY, REALLY DESIRE?
I want somebody who would respect me.
SO, WHAT IS YOUR DEFINI­TION OF SUCCESS?
Success is getting to a point where you are comfortable with what you have and who you are.
WHERE DO YOU SEE YOUR­SELF IN THE NEXT FIVE YEARS?
I am running a production com­pany called Ruth Kadiri Produc­tions and hoping that in five years’ time, it would be a household name and I am hoping that Ruth Kadiri will become a brand. I see myself as someone who inspires people and I hope that I don’t disappoint them.
HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU INTEND TO HAVE?
Maybe two…
BUT YOU LOVE KIDS. I WAS HOPING YOU’D SAY LIKE 10 OR SOMETHING IN THAT NEIGHBOURHOOD?
No! Loving kids does not mean you have to have many of them.
YOU ADORE UCHE JUMBO, WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT HER?
I think she is the most hard­working and sincere person I know especially in this industry. She is someone who is ready to tutor you and I’m somebody who doesn’t listen. For a colleague who could pick up somebody and dust her up and don’t give up on her no matter what speaks volumes. That is a strength I know I don’t have and I appreciate her so much for that.
YOU’RE HONEST WITH THE FACT THAT YOU’RE SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T LISTEN. TELL US HOW THAT PLAYED OUT WHILE GROW­ING UP?
I believe that every child who hopes to be independent must always have a mind of its own. And I also know that in being
independent, not everybody will agree with you. Mind you, having a mind of your own means that you must be able to define yourself. Like I said earlier, not everybody will agree with you so if I agree with you, you have to make me see reasons with you. If I don’t, then sorry! independent, not everybody will
AND HOW DID THAT PLAY OUT WITH YOUR DAD, YOU KNOW, YOUR PARENTS?
My dad is a very patient person and he is a complete gentleman; he never raised his hand on me.
NEVER? A NIGERIAN FA­THER?
Yeah. He never did but my mum, hmmm… (Laughter).
HOW HAS YOUR BUSINESS ADMINISTRATIONS SKILLS IMPACTED YOUR ACTING?
I’m a businesswoman; I produc­ing my own films now and I also run a clothes line called KR.
WERE YOU BORN WITH AT SILVER SPOON?
No! Does anybody think that?
TELL US ABOUT YOUR CHILDHOOD?
Even as a child, I knew what I wanted to be. In my bedroom then I had these picture of what I would be when I turn 18. I did a write up that when I turn 18, I would rent my own house. And my dad came by and saw it and he was like ‘where are you going by 18? Are you thinking about school?’ I was like ‘Dad, I want to be able to rent my own house and make my own money when I am 18.’ He just laughed it off but I think that deci­sion helped me; the desire to want to make your own money the right way helped me. When you grow up as a child in Ajegunle, it’s either it’s lost on you or it helps you find your way. Right now, there are so many mistakes that I can’t make. I see a lot of girls making certain mistakes that I don’t see myself ever making today. If I could discipline myself from childhood, then I should have a high level of resilience today. And then, grow­ing up in the slum helps you to define yourself and it is either you are defined or you’re not.
I READ SOMEWHERE THAT A FEMALE LECTURER ONCE ASKED YOU OUT. IS THAT TRUE? COULD YOU RELIEVE THE EXPERIENCE?
Yes.
BUT THERE WAS ALSO A DENIAL TO THAT CLAIM…
Somebody denied it? No! I have never. Hmmm… Okay, I was in school then. At first she took spe­cial interest in me and she was like ‘oh Ruth, you came to class today? Oh Ruth, you look like this and you look like that.’ In fact, the first time I wrote her paper she saw me and she was like ‘hmmm… you look familiar.’ And I said ‘No.’ Buts she was like ‘what are you even writing?’ You know that kind of interest, and later she added, ‘come and look me up in school.’ In fact, she knew the day that I was admitted to school and knew my scores. And then, one day, I think I missed her test or something like that and then I went to her office and she told me to take a seat opposite her and then she and she moved her legs and she was like doing what do they call it? I was pushing my chair backward and she was like ‘where are you going, listen to me!’ I was like ‘ah!’
DID YOU RUN OUT OF THE OFFICE EVENTUALLY OR DID YOU JUST SAY NO?
No, I didn’t say no…
WHAT IS IT ABOUT YOU THAT ATTRACTED HER TO YOU?
I don’t know.
SO, HOW DID YOU COPE?
I just started avoiding her. I knew her daughter so I went straight to make friend with her.
WHAT COULD MAKE RUTH KADIRI CRY?
(Laughs). I think I am very emotional-o. Anything could make me cry.
THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED, WHAT TRIGGERED IT?
It was something hurtful.
CAN YOU GIVE US SOME­THING SPECIFIC?
When was the last time I cried? Guess what, I cry so much that I don’t even know what makes me cry these days?
DO YOU CRY WHEN SEEING A MOVIE?
Yea! I cry when I watch myself cry in a movie.
RUTH KADIRI, DO YOU HAVE TATTOOS? IF NO, WHY?
No! I don’t, I just don’t like them-o.
A TATTOO WILL SIT WELL ON YOUR ARMS SO WHY DON’T YOU LIKE TATTOOS?
I am indifferent about tattoos but I don’t just like the idea of hav­ing one on my body.
YOU DON’T HAVE ANY IS­SUES WITH PEOPLE HAV­ING TATTOOS, DO YOU?
No! But when it is too much I have a problem. If you have tattoo it is okay as long as you can handle it.
YOU DON’T SEE YOURSELF TATTOOING YOUR LOVER’S NAME ACROSS YOUR BACK ANYTIME SOON, DO YOU?
Haba! Let me ask you a ques­tion. Did it favour all those that did it? Why should I go and do the same thing (laughter)?
WHAT IF HE DECIDES TO TATTOO YOU ON HIS BODY? WHAT WOULD BE YOUR TAKE?
Who will date a man that would want to tattoo you on his body?
SO, YOU WON’T DATE A MAN WITH TATTOOS?
I didn’t say that-o.
BUT YOU DON’T DRINK AND CLUB AND DO STUFFS LIKE THAT…
Ah, I drink alcohol-o.
A PHOTO OF YOU CLUTCH­ING YOUR BOOBS HAS GONE VIRAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA. WAS IT A PUBLICITY STUNT?
Guess what, the funny thing is that anytime I want to take a photo, I just find out that my hands are drifting unconsciously towards my boobs. But that, picture is causing a lot of controversy, hmmm…I don’t know-o.
WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF YOUR BODY?
I don’t know. I love every part of my body but probably, my head; yeah, that is my favourite part.
I READ SOMEWHERE ON­LINE WHERE YOU CLAIMED THAT A PARTICULAR STALKER TRACED YOU TO YOUR CHURCH BUT ENDED UP GETTING CONVERTED. AND THEN, THERE WAS THIS OTHER STORY OF A FEMALE LECTURER MAKING ADVANCES AT YOU. DON’T YOU THINK THAT IT IS YOUR FAULT THAT THESE PEOPLE ARE AFTER YOU BECAUSE YOU GIVE THEM SIGNALS THAT MAKE THEM COME AFTER YOU? DO YOU SWING BOTH WAYS?
You see, that was the first time it has ever happened but wait a minute, are you kidding me? Swing both ways? If you visit Unilag any day, you’ll notice that there are certain dresses that are allowed there. My favorite dress was a pair of jeans trousers and a top. What signal will somebody wearing a pair of jeans trousers and a top send? I hardly make up. I had to make-up because I was coming to meet you guys.
YOU GREW UP IN THE GHETTO. TO WHAT EXTENT HAS THE GHETTO MOULD­ED YOU INTO THE PERSON YOU ARE TODAY?
Coming from the ghetto helps you make certain decisions. For instance, lots of girls are doing hard drugs like heroin, marijuana, ecstasy, crack and cocaine today. I am not a judge but coming from where I grew up, I couldn’t engage in such things because I grew up in a place where smoking and sniff­ing of hard drugs was the norm. It didn’t influence me back then so I don’t see anybody or anything influencing me right now. I think growing up in the ghetto helps you; it has helped me tremendously. A lot of people had to make mistakes before learning their lessons; I grew up in the mistakes. Now the question is, if I was able to chart my course through all that, wouldn’t it be difficult to find my­self ending up a victim today?
I HAVE THIS FEELING THAT RUTH IS A GOOD GIRL. HAVE YOU ALWAYS BEEN A GOOD GIRL?
No, I am not a good girl and I am not a bad girl either. What makes one a good girl by the way?
HAVE YOU DONE ANY­THING THAT YOU ARE NOT PROUD OF?
We all have. But I don’t regret anything; I don’t think I regret anything.

Interview by Samuel Olatunji of the Sun